


Stormy - Petrel - Trust

by cutsycat



Series: Dictionary.Com Word of the Day Drabbles [1402]
Category: NCIS
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-07 07:54:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21212504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cutsycat/pseuds/cutsycat
Summary: Tony's been hurt by everyone his entire life. Is there anyone that's worth the pain?





	Stormy - Petrel - Trust

**Author's Note:**

> Another dictionary.com word of the day drabble. This time from 03/03/2003 for the word [stormy petrel](http://www.dictionary.com/wordoftheday/2003/03/03/stormy%20petrel).
> 
> stormy petrel  
noun  
the British storm petrel, Hydrobates pelagicus, of the eastern Atlantic Ocean, Mediterranean Sea, and Indian Ocean.  
a person who causes or likes trouble or strife.
> 
> This is for Prompt #4 of the August 2019 Five Prompts Challenge located [here](https://ncis-discuss.livejournal.com/205016.html).

Being disowned by his father, most people found Tony to be a stormy petrel. It wasn’t his fault, though. He was only 13.

He wasn’t allowed to get a job legally, which meant he had to resort to stealing and other things that landed him on the troublemaker list simply to survive. He probably should have been in an orphanage, but as he’d just been tossed out of the house on his ear none of the authorities were aware that he was now effectively an orphan. Tony wasn’t about to tell them either. 

He may only be 13, but he would prove that he was a better man than his father. Unfortunately, his first night on the street was not starting out very well. He thought he’d found shelter in a cardboard box, only for another kid to show up and beat him up for stealing his house.

Tony tried apologizing, but the kid wasn’t interested. Tony slinked off to find a new place to sleep, quickly finding himself in a torrential downpour. He was soaked before he had even gone 5 feet. 

He was shivering by the time he found a safe place to sleep. The next day he thought he’d found a great place. The guy seemed really nice until Tony realized the strings attached to him staying with the old man. Tony quickly left not wanting to pay that price. 

The man’s yelling of thief only made Tony’s reputation worse. He was beginning to think that he would never find someone who wasn’t interested in hurting him. Still he survived childhood even managing to get into college on a full scholarship somehow.

He thought that would mean people would stop hurting him, but he should have known better. He told people that he’d lost his shot at going pro due to a knee injury, but he could have easily come back from that if he’d wanted to. No, the truth was his coach had been making sexual advances and wouldn’t stop no matter how many times Tony told him no, so he’d given up on football and changed his career to law enforcement, so that he could put people like his coach behind bars. 

Surely, as a police officer people would stop hurting him. He was quite disturbed to find out people hurt police officer’s more than anyone else. Admittedly, most of the time it was physical which was a lot easier to handle than some of the emotional scarring from his youth.

That didn’t make being transferred after 2 years from 3 different police departments less painful by any stretch of the imagination, however. The last transfer had been the worst as he’d actually thought he could trust his partner until he found out he was dirty. So when Leroy Jethro Gibbs from NCIS offered him a job, Tony accepted. 

He decided to try something different this time. Since everyone would hurt him no matter what he did, he would play the fool. If they had a reason to hurt him or hate him, maybe it would make it hurt less. 

It worked for a while, but then the depression set in. He found out about Brenda Bittner’s death and he couldn’t keep up the facade anymore. He knew he was bothering his teammates with his seriousness, but he couldn’t pretend to be happy today. 

Gibbs finally banished him to autopsy, so that Ziva and McGee would get back to work. Tony tried not to let it bother him, but he couldn’t help it. Taking a seat on an autopsy table he continued reviewing the cold case he’d been working on.

“What brings you down here, Anthony?” Ducky probed, noting the unusually quiet man.

Tony shrugged. “Gibbs.”

“And why has Gibbs sent you down here?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Whatever is troubling you, you know you can share it with me, right, lad?”

“I’m just tired of being hurt, Ducky.”

“I, ah, didn’t know you were injured again.”

“Not physically.”

“Aaah.” Ducky nodded sagely. “As Erica Baican once said, ‘Everyone in life is going to hurt you, you just have to figure out which people are worth the pain.’”

“I’m beginning to wonder if anyone is worth the pain, Ducky. Maybe I’d be better off being a hermit.”

“Dear me, my boy. You simply cannot truly believe that.”

Tony immediately shut down at that comment. “Of course not, Ducky. I better get back to these case files.”

Ducky frowned after Tony as he left. Maybe he should have a discussion with Jethro before they lost the boy for good. Ducky didn’t know what was going on with the team, but it must be bad for Tony to be feeling that way.

When Ducky broached his concerns to Gibbs, Jethro’s forehead wrinkled. “I think it was just the shock of unexpected loss, Ducky, but I’ll check on him and make sure he’s ok.”

Ducky nodded, confident that Tony was in good hands, now. Gibbs finished up at the office quickly after that and headed over to Tony’s apartment. He knocked on the door and waited for Tony to open it.

“Boss? We have a case?”

Gibbs shook his head.

“Then why are you here?”

Gibbs wasn’t much for talking and after seeing Tony’s face, he realized that bringing up anything serious would just make it worse, so he grunted, “Game.”

Tony looked confused, but drew back to let Gibbs in. Locking the door behind Gibbs, Tony followed him to the living room couch. Tony just stared at Gibbs for a minute before moving and flipping the TV onto a basketball game.

Gibbs ignored Tony’s stare and confusion, knowing that Tony was more likely to open up about whatever was troubling him if Gibbs stayed silent. The basketball game played in the background. Neither of them were really watching it despite both of them having their eyes focused on it.

“You’re not actually watching the game.”

Gibbs grunted.

“You here because of Ducky?”

“He’s worried about you.”

“And you?”

“I’m worried too.”

“There’s no reason to worry. I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine.”

“I’m just tired of being hurt.”

“I wish I could promise not to hurt you, but we both know I hurt you as much as anyone. I’m sorry.”

Tony blinked. Gibbs apologized? “Thanks, Gibbs. Maybe you are worth the pain.”

“What?”

“Nevermind. Just something Ducky said.”

“You’re ok, now?”

“Yeah. I really think I am.”

**Author's Note:**

> The dictionary.com series has 1 story already written for it after this one, so I will be posting at least 1 more stories before I stop posting again. I'm hoping to get more stories written before then, so that I don't stop posting for a while. Wish me luck! 
> 
> It's 2019 now and I have closed my 2018 Prompt collection, but fear not my 2019 Prompt Collection is now open [here](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/cutsycat_NCIS_Prompts_2019/profile). Just click the sign up link. ;) It will remain open until the beginning of 2020. I'm hoping to complete all the 2019 prompts by the end of 2020. Do not fear I have not forgotten about the 2018 prompts and will continue working through them. It's just easier for me to not get overwhelmed if I keep the prompts separated by the year they were given to me.
> 
> If you are not an ao3 member, you can prompt me [here](http://cutsycat.livejournal.com/50701.html). Please follow the same rules as are listed in the above link. However, because this is a handmade prompt form(that thinks it's a poll), it is considerably more limited than what ao3 provides, so please use the ao3 form if you're an ao3 member. Please note the name option is for a name that I can say this is for so that you know it's for you. Since this is for non ao3 members it won't be true gifts, but you will be mentioned in the notes. Please note if you have already voted in the poll and would like to request more stories you can just add a comment to the poll. Please include the name along with the prompt, so that I can appropriately gift the prompt to you.
> 
> For any authors that want to chat and/or are looking for a place where they can toss plot ideas around and get input from people, you can come join my discord server that is specifically geared towards writing/encouraging people to write and authors. The invite link is [here](https://discord.gg/HFvwpCq). If you're not an author, but want to chat with me about writing/stories or anything else you are welcome to join. I reserve the right to boot you from my server if all you do is pester me about updates, however. *grin* Really anyone who wants to talk about writing and/or plot ideas for various stories is welcome to join. 
> 
> Also, Drakonyashka has translated a couple of my works into Russian. [Tutelage](http://archiveofourown.org/works/12378780) and [Imbue](http://archiveofourown.org/works/12378840). Go support them. 


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